Sham Soulmates Smeared and Shamed for Suspected Shill Sell Off
"Letty didn't know any better," Claims Defense Attorney Spartacus Hitchings

Doctors Ooter and Martha McHaggis , seen right eBaying their childhoods away, were served with what could be their final eBay message until their scheduled auction court appearance next week. "A Backpack and a Keyboard" got a copy of the notice from an undisclosed source:

SB NOTICE: eBay Registration Suspension - Shill Bidding

"This email is to notify you that your account has been suspended for a minimum of 7 days due to violation of our Shill Bidding Policy.

Shill Bidding is bidding that artificially increases an item's price or apparent desirability. Shill Bidding is prohibited on eBay. Information on eBay's Shill Bidding Policy can be found at:

http://pages.ebay.com/help/policies/seller-shill-bidding.html

Your account has been found to be involved in Shill Bidding with the following associated accounts:

lettydied

Lettydied, the sham couple's mother (and sham mother-in-law) claims she "didn't know [she] couldn't bid on the items" her sham son-in-law had uploaded from the same computer only moments before.

"I just saw that my Beanie Babies--the Beanie Babies I gave those kids--weren't selling. I paid top dollar for those things back in 1993. It's criminal the way the market has saturated. I don't want to see those kids starve in South America. I think what I did is what any mother would do."

Doctors McHaggis could not be reached for comment, but their attorney Spartacus Hitchings allayed fears that the couple had already fled the country.

The aged barister claimed that Doctor Martha is in Big Rapids Michigan and that "Doctor Ooter is tending to his Pokeweed tinctures in his Ann Arbor laboratories."

eBay officials were unavailable for comment. eBay stipulates that all appeals can only begin after a one week waiting period.

Adds Lettydied, "I just didn't want to see my Beanie Babies go."