On Going Home:
Some Expats' Perspectives

In keeping with my ongoing attempts to publish myself of my own personality (and words, for money), I met with a nice bureau chief from a certain well-known publication. He was surprisingly down-to-earth and more than welcoming in giving this young writer some pointers in getting pay for words and research.

This man had been in Africa for twenty some years and China for two. Since he'd just been back to visit family in DC, I asked him how he felt going home.

"That's a good question," he said, taking a long time to chew his sandwich and the question. "Lots of people say they feel disoriented when they go back. I never feel that way. I know what it's like to live in the States. It's not easy to forget."

"What I do notice is that I get annoyed a lot easier." He went on to explain a feeling familiar to many expats. When they go back, they realize that things have changed quickly, but they don't understand how those changes took place. Or, more overwhelmingly, they see how very little almost everything has. And that's an even more perplexing question.

"While abroad, I investigate why things are the way they are, but in the States I never devote serious time to this."

He said that people in particular also got to him. He talked about how people from anywhere find out that when they go home, they find out people are just mediorre, fat, and gross. Especially Americans. While he was obviously being a bit general in his characterizations, I share his sentiments.

I get annoyed at the sound of people slurping coffee, but in China I have learned to ignore bodily noises. In fact, when I don't slurp my noodles, my friends criticize me.

"I know I can't fetishize certain peoples. I'm going to have go home at some point in my careeer. People in China just as ordinary and gross as anywhere else in the world. I've just learned to ignore the disgusting parts."

As one old acquaintance said in Beijing, I'm afraid thatt when I go back to the States, I'm going to be in some board meeting situation and suddenly do this" (as he hacked a massive loogie on the street).

His roommate said, "What, like this?" (and did the same). "It's so liberating. And in China no one would care. The CEO would be doing it too."

Two weeks and counting. Then we're in the Americas. What dreams will come? What dreams won't? We humans are gross, and then we die!

Or, as the old roving bard once uttered:

O the magnet! the flesh over and over!
Go, dear friend! if need be, give up all else, and commence to-day to inure yourself to pluck, reality, self-esteem, definiteness, elevatedness;
Rest not, till you rivet and publish yourself of your own personality.

read all of "To a Pupil"here